Voodoo Tailz (2002) (V)

User Rating:

2.1/10   

Director:

Daniel Zirilli

Writers:

Daniel Zirilli (screenplay) and
Carl Washington (writer)

Genre:

Horror

Tagline:

May he bless your soul

Plot Keywords:

Voodoo | Blood | Gagged And Bound | Topless Woman | Mardi Gras

Cast

Merlynne Williams	...	Nicky
Moon Jones	...	Apoc
Daniel Zirilli	...	Nicolas
rest of cast listed alphabetically:
Demina Becker	...	Luna
Yuri Brown	...	Jacky
Cyd Casados	...	Sara
Louis De La Costa	...	Zane 'voodoo cult'
Daniel Kemp	...	Goth
Demara Khan	...	Voodoo Priestess
Ryan Protoge
Joe Solari	...	Rick (as Joseph Solari)
Dale Stelly	...	Tay
Stepfanie Tremblay	...	Rose
Carl Washington	...	Matthew

Also Known As:

Voodoo Mardi Gras (USA)

MPAA:

Rated R for language, sexual content and some violence.

Runtime:

78 min

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Black and White | Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.37 : 1

Certification:

USA:R

Filming Locations:

Los Angeles, California, USA

Company:

Pop Art Film Factory

This makes my brain hurt.

What a piece of crap.

I mistakenly rented this while trying to rent Cube (a much, much better film). I can only assume someone had placed it behind the Cube box as a joke, but since I had already paid for this movie, I thought I may as well watch it.

I haven't had this much trouble sitting through a movie to its completion since Gummo. There is no plot to speak of, no special effects whatsoever, no good dialogue, no good acting, and chock full of ridiculous stereotypes. They could have let these people read their lines from cue cards and it would've been just as effective.

The plot begins with three college girls (who are, at least, attractive) going to New Orleans for Mardi Gras. Apparently some "voodoo cult" composed of a scrawny black bartender, overweight white loser, and some other people whose faces we don't see (could it be because they are re-using actors from other roles?) has been kidnapping college girls every Mardi Gras.

In the confusing mess that follows, one of the girls' sister dies, one of the girls is kidnapped, a redheaded girl somehow joins the group, and the rest of them are kidnapped by the "cult." This cult apparently just smears blood all over their victims with chicken legs. The girls are "rescued" by the strangest undercover police officer ever, some seemingly incompetent police officers, and their escaped friend.

Best scene in the movie? The black girl putting a gun between one of the cult members' legs and yelling "Is this what you were lookin for, mutha-F***A??" It reminded me of Dolemite, and that's always a good thing.

Mercifully, this only lasts about 70 minutes, but a long 70 minutes those are. Any more and I believe my mental faculties may have shut down completely.