The Item (1999)

User Rating:

3.7/10   

Director:

Dan Clark

Writer:

Dan Clark (writer)

Genre:

Action | Horror

Tagline:

Something is dying to get out.

Plot:

Four felons are contacted by an anonymous client via the internet. They are instructed to go to a remote...

Plot Keywords:

Blood | Surrealism | Monster | Transvestite | Murder

Awards:

3 nominations

Cast

Dawn Marie Ferrara	...	Lauren (as DawnMarie Velasquez)
Dan Clark	...	Alex
Dave Pressler	...	Martin
Dan Lake	...	Fatty
Ron Fitzgerald	...	Dr. Ody
Romy J. Sharf	...	Nurse Nicky
Judy Jean Kwon	...	Rita
Kyle B. Cunningham	...	Joseph
Steven K. Mok	...	Drag Queen #1
Paul Balagot	...	Drag Queen #2
Alexandre Pierre	...	Drag Queen #3
Peter Sean	...	Robin
Alden Bunyan	...	Paulie

MPAA:

Rated R for strong violence/gore, sexuality, some language and drug content.

Runtime:

100 min | USA:97 min (video version)

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Sound Mix:

Dolby

Certification:

USA:R

Filming Locations:

Barstow, California, USA

Company:

Silver Sage Productions

Movie Connections:

Referenced in Dead Man's Dream (2002)

3 words...Kung Fu Transvestite

I rented this movie because the back of the box sounded awesome and I love horror flicks. Little did I know I was renting one of the cheesiest movies of all time. This one goes right up on my list. I don't mean cheesy as in funny B movie and worth watching...I mean cheesy like I wish I didn't waste my time and the $1.99 to rent it. I would have had a better time trying to count the blades of grass on my lawn. It had a couple of chuckle-worthy parts but that lasted for all of 1.9 seconds. The only saving grace for this movie was the "Kung Fu Transvestite" and the little weird parts that you might miss if you blink. Of course, they aren't worth the effort to actually see what I'm talking about.