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Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987)
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Overview
User Rating:
Release Date:
March 1987 (USA) moreTagline:
This Ain't No Hula!Plot:
Two drug enforcement agents are killed on a private Hawaiian island. Donna and Taryn, two operatives for The Agency... more | add synopsisUser Comments:
One word - OK, 2 words - LAME CHEESE! moreCast
(Cast overview, first billed only)| Ronn Moss | ... | Rowdy Abilene | |
| Dona Speir | ... | Donna Hamilton | |
| Hope Marie Carlton | ... | Taryn | |
| Harold Diamond | ... | Jade | |
| Rodrigo Obregón | ... | Seth Romero (as Rodrigo Obregon) | |
| Cynthia Brimhall | ... | Edy Stark | |
| Patty Duffek | ... | Pattycakes | |
| Wolf Larson | ... | J.J. Jackson | |
| Lory Green | ... | Rosie | |
| Rustam Branaman | ... | Kimo | |
| David DeShay | ... | Ashley | |
| Michael A. Andrews | ... | Michael / Michele (as Michael Andrews) | |
| Kwan Hi Lim | ... | Henry | |
| Joseph Hieu | ... | Bobby / Sumo Coach / Karate Villain | |
| Peter Bromilow | ... | Mr. Chang |
Additional Details
Parents Guide:
View content advisory for parentsRuntime:
96 minCountry:
USALanguage:
EnglishColor:
ColorAspect Ratio:
1.33 : 1 moreSound Mix:
MonoFun Stuff
Quotes:
Jade: My first wife used to mow the lawn stark naked.Rowdy Abilene: What'd your neighbors say?
Jade: They said I married her for her money.
Rowdy Abilene: [laughs, pause] Did you?
[laughs]
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Hard Ticket moreFAQ
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Discuss this movie with other users on IMDb message board for Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987)| Recent Posts (updated daily) | User |
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| Top 10 Funny/bad movies | ja_sullivan73 |
| This movie looks great. | djs-316 |
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This is the cheesiest file to ever grace the air waves! Cheese, cheese and MORE cheese! The ONLY reason this movie got made (and the others that followed!) is thanks to Ms. Spier's considerable weapons.... Other than that, there is not much reason to watch this movie (or its followers) unless it's to see Miss August, 1987 bounce about in her bikini and 6 inch pumps.....
Basic plot is just that - basic. Evil bad guy wants to take over the Hawaiian markets with drugs and diamonds. Add a killer snake to the mix (which was REALLY badly created!) and you've got a killer movie. NOT!
First off, lots of lame lines, lame action and lame 'near soft core' porn. The special effects (what there are of 'em) are cheesey and... Uh... LAME! The locations are - well, hey! It IS Hawaii, so its not lame. Hell, even the 'drag queen' double agent was lame! Now, honestly, how many of you watched this thing and DIDN'T know that Michelle was actually a MICHAEL? Again, LAME! So lame!
What had to be the most laughable aspect of the film, was the totally contrived scene with Donna and Rowdy - their 'sex' scene.... He looks like he's straight outta bad porn - especially with his fake moans and climax - and her acting wasn't much better. And, of course, isn't it always completely possible for two people to have sex when they're still wearing their underwear?!? Before, during and after, Donna and Rowdy are clothed.... Again, LAME!!!
OK. I think you may have gotten my point on this one - and the others made after it. But if you haven't, let me sum it up in one sentence: LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME AND LAME!