Quotes for
Reba Hart (Character)
from "Reba" (2001)

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"Reba: Every Picture Tells a Story (#1.9)" (2001)

Reba Hart: Cheyenne I have tons of cute maternity clothes left from when I had Jake.
Cheyenne Hart-Montgomery: No offense mom but you were 35, I'm like half that.

Reba Hart: Krya, Cheyenne just felt the baby move.
Kyra Hart: It's probably just gas.
Cheyenne Hart-Montgomery: I don't get gas.
Kyra Hart: We shared a room.

Brock Hart: Reba, where'd you get this?
Reba: Wrong Answer.

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"Reba: Brock's Swan Song (#1.13)" (2002)

Reba: Where is John D now?
Brock Hart: Oh, I don't know Reba I'm not a religious man.

Reba: Jake, what are you doing?
Jake Hart: I am watching TV and playing video games, I'm multi-tasking.

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"Reba: Who Killed Brock? (#4.16)" (2005)

Kyra: Barbra Jean wanted me to get a tape of the dog to give to the police
Cheyenne: Why didn't you just give them a picture?
Kyra: "Because it doesn't capture her spirit."
Reba: She's only had the dog a week. How many tapes could she have?
Kyra: These are just from yesterday. Check this out.
Reba: Wow, I feel sorry for the poor sap who had to videotape all that.
Kyra: 80 bucks is 80 bucks.

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"Reba: The Kids Are Alright (#6.13)" (2007)

[last line of the series]
Reba Hart: We're survivors.

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"Reba: Don't Mess with Taxes (#5.13)" (2006)

Barbra Jean: You know how i've been doing all of our tax returns?
Reba: Yeah, what's the problem?
Barbra Jean: I'VE been doing all of our tax returns! here, take a look!
Reba: Well, right off the bat i'd say you should stop doing the "I *heart* the IRS" stuff. It makes you sound desperate.
Barbra Jean: I am desperate! Oh, Reba i'm goin down! I'm headed for the big house!
Reba: Oh, barbara jean.
Barbra Jean: Promise me Reba, if i get sent to prison you will do something to get sent to prison too! And then we'll break out like on that show! You're gonna have to get the layout of the prison tatooed on your body so you're gonna need to gain some weight! Oh, GOD!
Reba: Calm down!
Barbra Jean: Oh, I love how tough you are. When we're in prison, i'm so gonna be your girlfriend!
Reba: Barbara jean, they only send you to prison if you lie on these forms... not because you put glitter all over it!
Barbra Jean: I would never knowingly lie! it would be because i just made these mistakes because i don't know what i'm doing, right?
Reba: Yeah, you should plead dumb! trust me after they talk to you for awhile they'll let you off. Heck, they'll probably even pay for your ride home!
Barbra Jean: Even if we didn't go to prison i would SO still be your girlfriend!

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"Reba: The Story of a Divorce (#1.14)" (2002)

Lori Ann: [Picking out a date for Reba] Here's one. Pilot. Looks great in a uniform. It'll be a chance for you to join the mile high club!
Reba: ...I'm already a member.

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"Reba: The Feud (#2.16)" (2003)

Barbra Jean: [To Brian about him and Reba being a couple.] I am so happy you two found each other, it used to be so awkward, 'Reba Hart, party of one!'
[Reba walks in]
Barbra Jean: And look at her, she's got that love glow
Reba: It's a fever sweat, Barbara Jean.
Barbra Jean: Oh yeah, a love fever
[puts her hand on Reba's forehead.]
Reba: I'll bite you.

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"Reba: Driving Miss Kyra (#4.19)" (2005)

[when Kyra is out five minutes late after getting her driver's license]
Barbra Jean: She's not picking up! Do you know what this means?
Reba: She has Caller ID?

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"Reba: Date of Mirth (#4.13)" (2005)

Brock Hart: [speaking of Barbra Jean and Brock's therapist who asked Reba out] You can't go out with him.
Reba: Why not?
Brock Hart: Barbra Jean likes him.
Reba: What?
Brock Hart: But she wouldn't steal anyone you like.
[Reba looks at him]
Brock Hart: Anyone you like now, anyone you like now.

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"Reba: The Ghost and Mrs. Hart (#3.7)" (2003)

Reba: You can't be afraid of ghosts! You're brave! I've seen you eat raisenet off the sidewalk!
Barbra Jean: It was a Junior Mint and I caught it before it hit the ground! Besides what do you know about fear Miss I'm-Not-Afraid-Of-Anything?
Reba: Why does everybody say that I'm not afraid of anything?
Barbra Jean: Because you're not. You're not afraid of the dark or thunder or wearin' pink with red hair. Which is not wise but you do it. You're fearless Reba!
Reba: It's not that I'm fearless, it's just that I think believing in ghosts is silly!
Barbra Jean: Well, you wouldn't think it was so silly if the ghost was after you!
Reba: What are you talking about?
Barbra Jean: If I tell you,you're just gonna make fun of me.
Reba: Barbra Jean I'm already makin' fun of you.
Barbra Jean: Alright if you must know the ghost is after me because I'm a bad person.
Reba: What?
Barbra Jean: I stole your husband, I broke up your family and now I have a way better house than you do!
Reba: So the reason you're afraid of ghosts is because you think they're gonna punish you for what you did?
Barbra Jean: Yeah.
Reba: Oh Barbra Jean, if anybody's gonna punish you it's me! And I promise you, when I die I will haunt you! Every noise you hear, everytime you trip, every bad hair day it'll be me!
Barbra Jean: Oh Reba, don't try to make me feel better! It just makes it worse because this horrible thing that I've done that I can't undo
[starts to cry]
Barbra Jean: I did to my very best friend!
Reba: Barbra Jean, we're not best friends.
[pause]
Reba: Barbra Jean things happen for a reason. Like maybe you're in my life because
[pauses and tries to think of a reason Barbra Jean is in her life]
Barbra Jean: Reba?
[Reba puts up her hand to quiet Barbra Jean while she tries to think]
Reba: [Thinks of something] I needed someone to ruin everything for me.
Barbra Jean: Well, yeah, I can see how that was helpful.
Reba: No, no, no, you know what maybe it was! I lived through my biggest fears. My husband left, Kyra moved out and things seemed to be just fallin' apart! You know, nothing gets scarier than that! But because of you I know that I can deal with anything now.
Barbra Jean: Wow
[Touches Reba's knee]
Barbra Jean: I wish I had the kind of courage brought on by a deep personal tragedy.
Reba: Well you married Brock, that's a start!
[Removes Barbra Jean's hand]

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"Reba: All Fore One (#4.7)" (2004)

Reba: [about Brock decideing to sell his practice or become a professional golfer] Good, I'm so glad you finally chose something, when do I get my money?
Brock Hart: You'll get your money, I'm going to go the driving range and work on my interview skills.
Reba: When do I get my money?
Brock Hart: No, No, No I couldn't be the next Tiger Woods.

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"Reba: Invasion (#5.9)" (2005)

Cheyenne: [about the guest list for Thanksgiving] So who's all comin?
Reba: Well, let's see; there's you and Van and not Barbara Jean; Jake and Elizabeth, and not Barbara Jean; and your dad and not Barbara Jean.
Cheyenne: I get it, Barbra Jean, Henry, and Kyra all went to Lubock
Reba: And for this we give thanks!

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"Reba: When Good Credit Goes Bad (#1.10)" (2002)

Reba: What kind of a sick person would spend 4,000 dollars on a diamond tiara, foxy women linguire, and then go on a 175 dollar shopping spree at Joy for Jesus Bookstore.
Kyra: [they look at each other and together say] Barbra Jean!
Reba: That's it. She can have my husband but nobody touches my credit card!
Cheyenne: Hey mom where you goin?
Reba: To you're dad's condo to strangle a princess!

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"Reba: Pilot (#1.1)" (2001)

[Cheyenne, 18, is planning her shotgun wedding]
Cheyenne: Getting married is so much fun. We should have done this junior year!
Reba: No, you were smart to wait.

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"Reba: War and Peace (#3.2)" (2003)

Reba: Do you know what a teenager is?
Barbra Jean: A demon?
Reba: A bully. What I'm sayin is if they know you're scared, you're dead.
Barbra Jean: But I am scared.
Reba: Of course you're scared, you're dealin with a demon!

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"Reba: It's Jake's Party, Cry If You Want To (#2.5)" (2002)

Barbra Jean: Aw, there's my Reba-Rooba-Roo!
Reba: [cheerfully] And if you all me that again and I'm gonna slap the blonde right off ya!

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"Reba: Trading Spaces (#6.3)" (2006)

Kyra: Hi everyone!
Reba: Where have you been?
Kyra: Getting milk.

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