Alien vs. Predator
2.5/5
Review by John Ulmer
Paul W.S. Anderson has always been good at one thing: Set design. In
"Event Horizon" he perfectly captured the dark essence of the "Alien"
series; with "Resident Evil" he managed to mimic the gothic structure
of all great zombie movies.
And that's about it. Because he's never been any good at three other
vital elements of filmmaking: Story, characters and actual direction.
"Alien vs. Predator" a project 14 astonishing years in the making
(longer than "Freddy vs. Jason") doesn't do much to change this.
Of course, we don't go to see movies about dueling alien species to
see deep themes and character development. But a little sympathy would
be nice.
I couldn't feel sympathy for any of the characters in "AvP" because
they were all unlikable clichιs: The Heroine, The Hero, The Nerd, The
Tomboy, The Gruff Leader, et al. They are all assembled together by
Charles Bishop Weyland (Lance Henriksen) to venture into the
Antarctic, where they will uncover an ancient pyramid recently
discovered by Weyland's multi-million dollar satellites hovering about
in space.
The pyramid is buried deep within the wastelands of the Antarctic
(2,000 feet, actually). Apparently, this is a good location for
battles. After venturing deep into the pyramid, the team of scientists
soon realizes that the pyramid is surprise, surprise! actually the
home of an alien hive. And furthermore, a pack of teenaged Predators
-- on an annual "manhood" hunting ritual -- are there, too, and they
begin to draw the humans into their fight, using them as "bait."
A plot like this takes ten seconds to brainstorm, and it took Paul
Anderson (not to be confused with the brilliant Paul Thomas Anderson)
two years to turn it into a mess of unresolved threads and silly
concepts. Rumored to be in pre-production since 2002, finally entering
production in October of 2003, Anderson initially came up with the
idea, basing it on previously established material. In short, he stole
a lot of it; and allegedly "borrowed" 40 pages from an unused original
"Alien" script written back in the 70s.
But in movies like these, plots really aren't a big deal. "Alien"
wasn't ingenious, was it? Spacecraft stumbles upon alien; alien gets
on spaceship. All that matters, really, is how it's handled and
"AvP" is handled quite poorly.
The movie's cast is comprised of many newcomers and (to be blunt) they
are all unimpressive. Sanaa Lathan, as Alexa, the heroine, is frankly
rather annoying. Raoul Bova, playing the hero Sebastian, is the most
likable of the characters but even then, he's just no Arnold. The
dialogue is all lame yeah, "Predator" had lame dialogue ("Knock,
knock!") but at least it was funny and delivered with charisma. There
was really only one line I laughed at in this a sign that the movie
is taking itself way too seriously.
Even Henriksen is on cruise control here. Re-playing perhaps one of
his only well-known roles (as Bishop, the robot from "Aliens"),
Henriksen is just in it for the paycheck. According to the story's
roots, Weyland is the billionaire who creates the Bishop robots,
modeled after his own image. (Why the Bishop robots look eighteen
years younger than Weyland is never explained.) Besides, it is no
coincidence that the only returning cast member from either series
happens to be the same actor who has appeared in a number of recent
straight-to-video duds. Desperation?
Kudos must be given to one other aspect of "AvP": Its creature
effects. I had expected lots of CGI, and to be fair there is quite a
bit of it (more than Anderson claimed there would be in interviews).
But there are also many close-ups of the Predators and Aliens played
by thankless actors in suits (and some good ol'-fashioned
animatronics). Kevin Peter Hall (the original Predator) passed away
shortly after the release of the film's sequel, but Anderson has
comprised an acceptable team of replacements (most of the actors being
some seven feet tall!).
That, and the set design, and one or two OK action sequences, makes
"AvP" suitable, I suppose. If you're just looking for the average
Saturday night blow-em-up action flick, you could do worse. It's an
amiable effort. But, considering the potential, this movie continually
disappoints and worst of all, due to its disgraceful rating, the
fights (which take place all too often and rapidly become boring) are
all over the place. We are not "allowed" to see anything, which
hinders the flow of the film.
I had been looking forward to this movie for quite some time now,
being a fan of both "Alien" (1979) and "Predator" (1987). With its
out-of-place PG-13 rating, poor acting, awful writing and mediocre
direction, "AvP" disappoints the fans at every turn Fox has taken
two of their greatest franchises and turned them into a joke. This is
nothing more than typical action fare which, all considered, isn't
much of a compliment at all.
========== X-RAMR-ID: 38454 X-Language: en X-RT-ReviewID: 1309164 X-RT-TitleID: 1134655 X-RT-SourceID: 1382 X-RT-AuthorID: 6769 X-RT-RatingText: 2.5/5
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