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The new movie I Spy has very little to do with the groundbreaking television series of the same name. The TV show as the first to feature a black actor (Bill Cosby) in a lead role, which was a pretty big frigging deal back in 1965. In Betty Thomas's feature-film adaptation, that pioneering character has been transformed from an educated gentleman into a ghetto-talking asshole. Look how far we've come! And I bet you won't hear a peep about any black leaders wanting to edit this movie, like they did last month's Barbershop.
Spy is one of those films in which so little thought went into the story, the characters often whine about not being able to keep things straight. But consider this: It took four people to pen a story that doesn't make a lick of sense. American audiences are so used to making dumb movies box-office successes, why should screenwriters bother trying any harder than this? I saw Spy about two weeks ago, and - no joke - didn't remember what it was about. I remembered the two main characters, and recalled them being on some kind of mission, but I had to look at my post-screening notes to refresh my memory. And even then it was a stretch.
For the record, Spy is about the Bureau of National Security and their attempt to reclaim the stolen prototype of an invisible jet (a la Wonder Woman). Fearing the possessor of the jet (Malcolm McDowell) will auction the "Switchblade" technology off at an upcoming get-together with the world's most devious criminal minds, the BNS dispatches bumbling agent Alexander Scott (Owen Wilson, The Royal Tenenbaums), but not before pairing him with a rather unlikely sidekick.
Because McDowell's bad guy is a huge boxing fan and has arranged his party/jet auction around an upcoming title bout, the BNS taps undefeated boxing champion Kelly Robinson (Eddie Murphy, Showtime) to partner with Scott. With the mouthy Robinson at his side, Scott will be able to infiltrate the super-villain gathering, even though he is inexperienced in anything more dangerous than a stakeout (Why doesn't anyone fire him? And how does he get his shit together in the last reel?). In true buddy-pic fashion, the two don't get along at first, but Spy can't even master this cliché, as the characters fight, then get along, then fight, then get along (and so on).
Watching the two stars interact for real on The Tonight Show before the film hit theatres was a hundred times more engrossing than the film itself, to say nothing of how it pales in comparison to even the weakest episode of Alias. If Wilson's paycheck enables him to hole up for a year with Wes Anderson so they can make another great indie film, I guess that makes Spy slightly more tolerable. He's able to stretch even the worst dialogue into laughs, but making crappy movies like this just has to be taking a toll on his soul. Murphy, on the other hand, clearly has no soul to worry about. How many more goddamn times do I have to watch him play the same cocky megalomaniac who constantly refers to himself in the third person? It's getting to be as entertaining as seeing Tom Cruise play a good-looking yet horribly vapid ladies' man.
1:37 - PG-13 for action violence, some sexual content and language
========== X-RAMR-ID: 33258 X-Language: en X-RT-ReviewID: 804323 X-RT-TitleID: 1118112 X-RT-SourceID: 595 X-RT-AuthorID: 1146 X-RT-RatingText: 5/10
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